The Man of the Hour

Self satisfied and loud, the Man in the Yellow Shirt sits at my dinner table every night with new topics and discussions that causes the party to ponder while they sleep, on the thoughts that were shared during that night's meaty meal.

With his outrageously confident personality and small dinosaur like tooth, he commands our attention with quips like those that you would hear on an esoteric cable channel.

To conclude the text, throughout this blogs the discussions and thoughts that roll through this man's somewhat small brain and off his little icky tongue will be revealed and shared with the people of the internet.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

April 6, 2010

So in our family we have this tradition; every time we have chicken, green veggies, mashed potato's and gravy we reconstruct a part of the Lord of the Rings movies. Last night while no one participated in the construction of the food we met stages number 2 and 4. It is a rare occasion that all 5 of the stages will be shared at the dinner table. Oh those stages...

Let me tell you about the 5 stages of eating. When at the dinner table there is a rule: you eat what is on your plate. If you don't you don't leave the dinner table and you can sit there all night and miss the new episode of LOST, which was quite confusing last night. The Man in the Yellow Shirt eats a lot of junk food and has snacks between each meal and so on and so forth, so we tend to give him food to eat. (Sometimes if he leaves the table or looks away The Man Who Drinks Red Wine will add more to his plate). The stages start a few minutes after dinner...

Stage 1: "I don't like a lot of my food on my plate at one time. I will grab some more later."
Stage 2: "Don't worry I will eat all the food on my plate I am just saving my favorite part for last."
Stage 3: "I don't like that part it's icky and makes me feel bad."
Stage 4: "I am letting my food digest so that I can eat some more."
Stage 5: "I'm not hungry anymore and can't keep eating other wise I am going to be sick...when's desert?"

And there you have it. The 5 famous stages of eating from The Man in the Yellow Shirt. Let me tell you he had us the first couple of times but after a while we became suspicious because he would just go and eat junk after dinner.

In conclusion: if you have a child or sibling who does something like this, chances are they're getting your goat.

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